Limbaughium
Lb |
The heaviest known element. It possesses an ever-expanding mass. Very white. Acidic. Emits heat but no light. Instantly polarizes all elements that come in contact with it. Repels protons and electrons; attracts only morons.
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Billclintium
Bc |
With a slick appearance and slimy texture, this element undergoes a series of interesting changes when in hot water.
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Canadium
Eh |
Similar to Americium, but a little denser. Much more rigid. Often called Boron.
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Innofensium
Pc |
Precisely equal numbers of electrons, protons, neutrons, leptons, quarks. Completely inert, utterly useless, but smells like a rose.
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Newtium
Nt |
Extreme irritant. Carries a strong negative charge. Does not possess magnetic properties. Can be purchased cheaply.
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Quaylium
Qd |
Einsteinium it ain't.
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Budweisium
Ps |
Has no taste or smell; is often indistinguishable from water.
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Cabmium
Cb |
Found in abundance, except when needed. Exists in two states, in motion and at rest. When in motion, it cannot be stopped, no matter what you do. Cabmium has a charge associated with it. The charge is variable, and scientists have not determined the formula for calculating it.
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Snot
Sn |
Bonds forever with corduroy.
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Politicium
Po |
Contains a great deal of gas. Similar to radon in that it can reach lethal concentrations in the House.
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Congress
Cg |
Atomic number 525. Can never be found in a solution.
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Chemistry in Wash DC
